Different Me (A cringeworthy title for a kind of weird post)

You every get that flashback where you seem to see yourself from a third-person perspective? Now that exams had finished I feel like when I look back to myself months ago I was a bit more energetic and talked a lot (perhaps more than humanly necessary). But now, I just don't make much effort.

This had occurred to me more prominently when, on one of my first lessons back, I had walked to my classroom early and it was only me and my teacher in the room. The silence was horrible but she was preoccupied with fiddling with the computer for a few minutes before trying to converse with me (to which I responded with unenthusiastic nodding or shaking of my head).

Upon noticing this, she said a few words that still resonate in my mind and make me shiver and thirsty whenever I think of it. "Did you lose your voice?" to which I responded with an unenthusiastic head shake. No. I didn't lose my voice.

Why did she come to this conclusion? Was it because during those few moments of silence alone, a-few-months-ago-me would've tried to make a horrible joke or muse about the weather as an attempt to break the ear shattering silence? Had I lost a piece of my soul while being under the stress of the exams? Will I ever regain this? Or am I still the same person who just constantly tries to be someone they want to be whilst perpetually feeling inadequate?

Or maybe I stress over smaller, impertinent things in my life because there's no major life changing event happening. This is why I shouldn't be allowed to think alone for a significant amount of time.

Thanks for reading. Nice face.(I could come up with a better general compliment but I think that's pretty good)